In This Edition of Turtle Head
- 亂世派對 ~ Tempore Chao
- 關於原則 ~ Default Principles – Communal Effort
- 處女之聲 ~ Virgin Voices – Skye
- 漫畫 ~ Comic
- 火人回憶 ~ Veteran Memories – Basilscord
- 關於服務 ~ Volunteering – 火舞表演 / Fire Performance
亂世派對
Tempore Chao
In the beginning, there was Chaos. But from the chaos sprung the Default – a world of rules and systems. A world of limited expression. While in many way that world served the people who lived there, it also worked to dampen their true selves. But behind it all, the Chaos remained, hidden in Default like a shadow on the water, unclear and insubstantial.
As time went on, the people clamored to return to the Chaos they had once known. But they did not know how. Their voices rose and fell, a great sound that called forth the Cacophony, the Children of Chaos. These Chaotics brought the people moments of madness, of self expression, of temporary release from Default. They taught the people their ways. Thus was born the Society.
In the late 1980s, members of the San Francisco Cacophony Society attended a little party at Baker Beach. That radical moment grew into what we now call Burning Man. But when they weren’t burning structures, members of the Society were radically expressing themselves together by gathering and spreading a little chaos.
Sitting proudly in that great shadow is the Cacophony Society’s newest lodge: Tempore Chao. And you may already be a member. Join us as we spread a little chaos and express ourselves radically – with tea!
宇宙初始，天地混沌。時光荏苒，這片混沌孕育出了常態社會的規則和系統，成為生活中依循的原則；然而卻削弱了人們真實的自我，表達與展現因此受限。「混沌」就如同水面的倒影潛藏在常態秩序中，曖昧朦朧。
隨著時間推移，人們嚷嚷著要回到他們曾經熟悉的混沌，但是不知該如何才能做到；他們的聲音此起彼落，成為一股喧囂嘈雜。這些失序給人們帶來瘋狂的時刻、自我表達的時刻，以及得以擺脫常態面具、暫時放縱的時刻。失序竟將人們凝聚成一個「群體」。
1980 年代後期，舊金山「嘈雜協會」的成員們參加了貝克海灘的一個小型派對；那熱烈的氛圍演變成我們現在所說的火人節。當火人們沒在燃燒祭品時，大家透過在集會盡情展現自己、同時迸發一些「混亂」的美麗火花。
此刻，「亂世派對」在嘈雜協會的羽翼下驕傲地誕生了！只要你血液裡流竄著瘋狂的想法，你就是我們的一份子！喝杯茶、加入我們── 盡情展現自己中挾帶一點混亂又何妨？
Default Principles
關於原則
Communal Effort / 社群共同努力
~Gypsy~
(Disclaimer: this was written during level 3 soft-lockdown in Taipei)
Our community values creative cooperation and collaboration. We strive to produce, promote and protect social networks, public spaces, works of art, and methods of communication that support such interaction.(burningman.org)
In the year of our chaos, 2021, we are all in the pandemic mess together. In such a situation, it is a true communal effort to get through the situation as a whole. It may feel like you’re not doing much and that’s the point of communal effort. Everyone does their little part, and all of those little parts added together make something massive.
To make a Burn happen it takes communal effort. Everyone does their little part to make the whole thing that much better. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses- always remember: one person’s strengths are another person’s kryptonite. This communal effort is what makes a Burn special. Everyone does *something* in their camp, with the art, workshops, etc. No one single person should be doing all of the work. Communal effort is also an exercise in personal limitations and boundaries. What CAN you do and what DO you have the energy for when you might have multiple projects going at the same time.
Back to Default World, communal effort might be found at your job, in your household, or in your hobbies where there are multiple people involved for a single goal. Remembering that you are allowed to say no when you have multiple projects in the works or just do not have the energy for is alright as well, but when you do have the energy- communal efforts do help build amazing working and personal relationships.
(免責聲明：寫於台北疫情3 級警戒下)
我們的社群重視創意方面的合作與相互扶持。 我們努力開創、推廣、和保護支持上述合作精神的社群網絡、公共空間、藝術作品和交流方法。（burningman.org）
在2021，這名為「混亂」的一年中，沒有人能對疫情的影響視若無睹。「如何讓整個社會平安度過疫情」就是共同努力的體現。或許你覺得自己沒有做太多事情，這其實就是共同努力的重點── 每個人都在份內的事情上盡責，加總起來就可以帶來巨大的改變。
如同辦一場火人活動，也需要社群共同努力：每個人在自己的一小部分上盡力，共同讓整體活動變得更好、更完善。每個人都有自己的強項和弱項——切記：一個人的強項可能是另一個人的致命傷。因此，共同努力更加彰顯了火人活動的特別處。在營地裡，每個人都有自己的事情要忙，包括製作藝術品、參與工作坊等…… 沒有一個人有義務要負責所有的工作；此外，共同努力也是對「個人能力上限」與「相處界限」的練習——當有很多事情同時在進行時，意願上樂意參與卻不見得是實際體力上能負擔的。
回到常態社會，或許在職場、家中、甚至是興趣同好的圈子中都能看見當眾人追求集體目標時展現出的「共同努力」。記得：當你分身乏術、精疲力盡時，說「不」也沒關係。待重整狀態後，為社群付出一己之力，相信在作品成果和團隊氛圍上都能有甜美的豐收。
Virgin Voices / 處女之聲
~Skye~
今年是我第一次參與火人活動。在我真正體驗之前，已經聽過各方朋友分享火人活動的經歷，但我還是不確定要期待什麼；很多人都說到了「回家」的概念、也就是能夠真正按照自己想要的方式生活。我喜歡這個想法，但不太相信這種可能性。
天啊，我錯了。
我過去從來沒有像在龜焱時那樣自由地表達自己和感到放鬆。空氣裡的氛圍告訴我：「勇於嘗試、卸下武裝。」 剛開始，我有點猶豫要不要穿上我帶來的衣服；但就在我穿上它們的那一刻，整個世界都感覺更自由、更有愛。
因為「愛」就是我在整個活動期間的最終極、最深刻的感受── 對他人和對自己的愛。我感受到前所未有地被接納。作為一個性別酷兒（我同時有鬍子和乳房，介於女性和男性表徵之間），當我想照自己的心意展現自己，若是在一個酷兒友善程度不夠明確的空間中，總是覺得有點尷尬；然而當我在山上時，這一切似乎都不重要。我正在體驗過去從未經歷過的「完全展現自我」原則，因為沒有任何條件。你不必是酷兒、跨性別、女人、男人、成人、孩子……你想成為任何人、用任何方式呈現自己，都無須擔心。
我等不及下一次的火人活動了。
This year was my very first Burn. I’d heard a lot about the Burn experience before this, but I didn’t really know what to expect. Lots of people had talked about the idea of “coming home” and being able to really live as you wanted to live. I loved that idea, but I didn’t really believe that that was possible.
Boy, was I wrong.
Never have I felt as free to express myself and just relax as when I was at Turtle Burn. There was just something in the air that said, “Go ahead. Get vulnerable.” At first I felt a bit hesitant about getting into the clothes I’d brought with me, but once I changed into them it was like the whole world felt a little bit freer, a bit more loving.
Because that’s ultimately what I felt throughout the camp: a sense of love, both for others and the self. I felt welcome there more than I’ve ever felt in my life. As someone who is genderqueer (I have both a beard and breasts and fall somewhere between feminine and masculine expression), I almost always feel just a bit awkward when presenting how I want to in any space that isn’t explicitly queer. When I was on the mountain, none of that seemed to matter. I was experiencing the principle of Radical Self Expression like I’d never felt before because there were no strings attached. You didn’t have to be queer, trans, woman, man, adult, child… You can be whoever and whatever you are without worry.
I can’t wait until we burn again.
-Skye
By Joel Fremming
Veteran Memories
~Basilscord~
Enchanted: A post AfrikaBurn story
Part One
About a meeting and how personal flow is about embracing opportunities.
It started out as a not so innocent night out. I was to meet a friend at a club called Fiction. He didn’t know I was coming. At the unusually uncrowded entrance a woman stepped in line behind me. There was an explosion. An explosion of light, colour and beauty. From top to bottom she glistened and sparkled like the nightscape of the AfrikaBurn that was so fresh in my heart. Her dinky tilted hat and set hair was coiled with purple fairy lights. Her eyes shined with black glitter trailing down to her black lipstick, a broad smile breathing strength and power. More purple curved down her body in a sparkling corset, leading to the frills of a layered netted skirt. A psychedelic arrangement of black and purple wrapped her legs down to polished high heels.
I came out of my daze to hear the words, “I love your outfit, whatever you are, you are so beautiful!” This came from a passer by, an entranced reveler who turned around just to say those words to her. I realised I was smiling. He was right. I had a moment then where I thought I won’t say anything and just let it be. My smile faded. I wanted to keep smiling.
I told her much the same thing as she had just heard, all the while my smile continuing. We were nearing the pay stand of the club. I told her she should get in for free with her sparkly self. She said she didn’t mind paying. I pitched the she-should-get-free-entry-for-being-fabulous bit to the door lady. She got in for free. How can you be that awesome and not be gifted things? Inside, I saw my friend and introduced her much like an old friend would. I wanted to say to him, “This is my muse.” And although I didn’t know it, for the next forty eight hours, she would be.
Names were exchanged shortly after this, hers being Lia, mine being Basil. I felt little concern for names at that point. She was crowd watching, I was Lia watching. I stood on my tippy toes and leaned in for a kiss. She turned her cheek, thinking I was going to tell her something. I laughed and drew her lips toward mine. The kiss was that of falling into a bed filled with down feathers. I drew back, whispering, “That’s what I’ve been wanting to do since I saw you.” We partied mostly away from each other from then but I felt we wouldn’t leave without each other.
When we did find each other we decided it was time to go. We found our way down and out of a very tired Fiction. As we walked arm in arm down Long Street. I knew we had been targeted. Nigerian, Congolese or Mozambican. I couldn’t tell which, one of the noticeably darker African groups had taken up stride in close proximity to us. I adjusted my awareness. She checked her bag. Her phone was gone. A tall dark man walked past.
“It’s him. It’s fucking that guy,” I said.
“Hey buddy!” I grabbed his shoulder. He pulled away and made a run. Around a car. Really? He was going to get away by pussy-footing around a car? This all took place amidst screams and shouts from both us and his partners. Lia grabbed the initiative and headed around the other side of the car. I have never seen a woman in heels move that fast. We cut him off at the bumper. Lia almost cut his throat. She grabbed him by the neck with one hand, her veins standing out, the sure grip of her whitening fingers digging into his dark skin. Even through his ‘Hey, you got me’ smile, I saw the fear in his eyes. He offered the phone up to her. She grabbed it with her other hand, both of us shouting at him all the while. Looking back I can only think that some deep rooted piece of Africa was brought out in both of us then. The raw physical prowess, the power to command a situation with the strength of our voices, the surety of knowing we were in the right and the unwavering confidence that we would not be harmed.
We needed tequila. A small sushi spot beckoned. One of her friends arrived. We got a free round. The glory of Lia’s attire had not faded. The rest of the night is softly blurred. A long walk, seemingly to nowhere. A car ride to a beach front apartment overlooking an endless sea, melding into the black sky. A taxi ride filled with thrill and ecstasy. A steaming bath with a giant window looking down on Long Street, hot water shared in passion. A walk down into Long Street, vision wavering. A meeting with two others on a traffic island. We four shared coffee as the sun rose. Many more kisses with Lia. Delectable, lingering, soft and unabashedly open. Sleep was attempted. Too much excitement, too much coffee. I needed my own bed. A kiss farewell and the promise of a meeting the next day.
Enchanted：寫在非洲火人節後
（一）
關於一場會議，和個人成長就是擁抱機會的過程。
一切都在某個不單純的夜晚開始。我打算到一間叫做Fiction的夜店找朋友，但他不知道我會到。在異常擁擠的入口前，一個女人排到我後面。突然之間一切都炸開了：一場光、色彩、和美的爆炸。她像非洲火人節的夜晚一樣閃爍發光著的樣子，直到現在都還會浮現在我心上。她頭上的小帽子和頭髮都纏著紫色燈串，黑色亮片從她閃亮的雙眼流下，連接著黑色唇膏，她燦爛的笑容充滿生命力。更多紫色出現在她腰身的馬甲，延伸到格子裙的裙擺。一首黑和紫的迷幻樂曲圍繞著她的腿，配上一雙完美的高跟鞋。
我從恍惚中回神，聽到路過的人說：「我好喜歡妳的衣服！不管妳是什麼，妳都好美！」一個著迷的仰慕者特地轉回來讚美她。我發現自己正在微笑。他說得沒錯，我以為自己什麼也不會說，讓機會就這樣消逝，但我想著想著，臉上的笑容逐漸消失，我希望能保留這份微笑。
我邊微笑著，重複了一次她才剛聽過的話。我們離售票口越來越近，於是我告訴她，她的耀眼應該要能讓她免費入場，她説她付錢也沒關係。我和入口處的女員工再重述一次她應該免費入場的理論，於是她真的得到了優待。一個這個完美的人怎麼能不得到贈與呢？在裡面，我看到朋友，像老朋友見面一樣介紹了她們認識。我很想脫口而出：「這是我的繆思女神。」當時我還不知道，在接下來的四十小時內，她確實成為我的女神。
我們後來終於交換了名字，她叫Lia，我說我叫Basil。到那個時候我早已不在乎名字，她觀察著人群，而我則凝視著她。我踮著腳尖彎腰想給她一個吻，她轉過頭，以為我要和她說什麼秘密。我笑著伸手把她的嘴唇轉向我，給了她一個像羽毛般輕盈的吻。我退後一步，輕聲說：「從我見到妳的瞬間我就想要這麼做了。」在那之後，我們就沒有待在一起，但我一直感覺到我們不會獨自離開。
最後我們確實回到彼此身邊，彼此都同意該離開了。我們一起踏出越來越安靜，有點疲憊的Fiction。當我們牽著手沿著Long Street走去，我立刻察覺我們被盯上了。是奈及利亞、剛果、還是莫三比克人，我無法分辨，一群皮膚黝黑的非洲人和我們之間的距離越來越近。我檢查了一下自己，她也翻找了皮包，發現她的手機不見了。一個高大黝黑的男人經過我們身旁。
「是他，就是那個人。」我說。
「喂！」我抓住他的肩膀，他扯開我的手，立刻開始繞著車輛跑。有沒有搞錯啊？他躡手躡腳的是想要逃到哪裡？一切都在我們以及他的同伴的尖叫和怒吼中發生，Lia立刻跑到車子的另一頭想擋住他，我從來沒看過穿高跟鞋的女人跑這麼快。我們在一個路肩堵住她，Lia感覺差點砍了他頭，她一手抓住男人的脖子，血管都爆了出來，能清楚看到那脖子上的手抓得多緊。儘管對方臉上帶著「好吧被你抓到了」的邪笑，我能看見他眼中的驚恐。他把手機遞給她，我們兩個都對著他大罵。現在回想，我能感受到某個屬於非洲土地的部分浮現在我們身上，那純粹的肉體力量，用聲音掌控現場的力量，知道自己站在正義一方、擁有無法動搖的自信，知道我們不會受到傷害的力量。
我們事後都需要來杯龍舌蘭，於是我們到了一間小小的日本料理店。她的一個朋友來找我們，請我們喝了一輪。Lia的服裝依然耀眼，但當晚剩下的情節越來越模糊。我只記得長時間的漫步，不知道通往何方，以及坐著車抵達一座有海景的公寓，伴著無止盡的黑夜。一趟充滿刺激和狂喜的計程車之旅，在有大窗戶的浴室的熱水澡，在激情中的Long Street夜景。在模糊的視線中走過Long Street，在安全島上和另外兩個碰頭，四個人一起喝咖啡看日出。更多更多的親吻。可口的、流連的、輕柔和大膽的親吻。好像有試著入睡，但周遭有多刺激、喝了太多咖啡。我只能在自己的床上入睡。最後互相道別的吻，以及隔日見面的承諾。
Volunteering / 關於服務
火舞表演
Fire Performance
~Basilscord~
My volunteering started before the event. I enrolled myself as one of the fire performance crew on discord. Pretty quickly I found myself taking the “lead fire performance” role. TB needed someone. I had the experience and more importantly, I wanted to do it. If you’re going to volunteer, you have to want it.
I arrived on Friday evening and went to find someone who could tell me about the performance. The answer was, basically, to just roll with it when the time comes. That made me relax considerably. Maybe too much. Fast forward to Saturday night: I’m chilling at camp and Yoshi (thank fuck for him) very politely comes to my chair, “Hey, are you Basil?” I affirm. “Okay we need to start the fire performance soon… so what’s going on with that?” My eyes went a little wider, “Oh shit ja. What’s the time now?” I had about 40 minutes. Perfect.
I gathered my gear and my wits and headed down. With some shouts and runners, the crowd began to gather. Ian, Joel, Tony and I went over the plan for the intro and outro of the performance. I gave the performers the safety briefing and we decided the order of performers. I put on my loud boy pants and addressed the crowd. Everyone quietened down… after Joel and Ian put on their loud boy pants. The crowd listened, accepted and understood (special thanks here to a welcome burner translating on the spot). The performance was awesome and the effigy burned beautifully. Success!
After Temple Burn, I found myself introducing virgin spinners to fire spinning. There must have been 20 people, back to back for three hours. I couldn’t leave – if no one was there for safety, shit could go down. The briefing that came to me was: “Fire is an element. It will not respect you. Respect it.” People played and the fire was not just in their hands, it was in their eyes – it was in their hearts.
Climbing into bed, stinking of paraffin, I was exhausted. And so very, very full.
在龜焱籌備期間，我在Discord 上報名火舞表演；不久後就確認，我將在活動中擔任表演的主力。龜焱需要大家共同付出和真心參與；除了我過去已經有相關演出經驗，更重要的是，我真的想為團隊做些什麼。如果你有機會自主參與，「真摯的意願」是很重要的。
我在星期五晚上抵達營區，並去找比我更熟知表演細節的人。基本上我得到的答案是「在時機成熟的時候就順其自然地開始吧」。這讓我放鬆了很多。也許太多了…… 快轉到週六晚上：我悠閒地待在營地，Yoshi（他X的感謝他）非常客氣地走向我，「嘿，你是 Basil 嗎？」我說「是。」 「我們待會兒就要開始火舞表演了……目前有什麼想法嗎？」我的瞳孔頓時放大，「哦，該死的。現在幾點了？」我有大約 40 分鐘。完美。
我收拾好裝備、整頓好腦袋，走向會場。有人從我身邊跑過、有人興奮地喊叫，大家開始聚集。Ian, Joel, Tony 和我一起確認了表演開頭與結尾的流程、我再向表演者夥伴們佈達流程的重點、安全要點、接著決定了表演者的順序。我扯開嗓門試圖與全場觀眾說話，但無法與大家高張的情緒抗衡！直到Joel 跟Ian 也扯開嗓門，所有人的躁動才逐漸平息下來，聽進且理解了我們的宣導（在此特別感謝一位火人朋友協助即席翻譯）。我們的火舞演出非常順利、雕像也燃燒得很漂亮。成功！
在燃燒神廟之後，我開始帶一些新手體驗轉火棒；一個接一個，三小時下來肯定有二十個人。我不能離開—— 如果沒有人在現場維護安全，風險可能難以想像。我的宗旨是：火是一種元素，它不會尊重你；你要學會尊重它。「玩火」，火不僅在人們手中、還在人們雙眸——它在人們心裡。
等我終於爬上床，身上聞起來還有一股石蠟的臭味。我筋疲力盡、心中卻充實無比。
